Girl Power by Djuanna Brockington
By Djuanna Brockington • Sep 19th, 2008 • Category: Free Flow Friday •
Email This Post
• 
Print This Post
Girl Power by Djuanna Brockington
Last Friday, my girlfriends and I went to an afternoon showing of The Women. Cute movie. If you have ever seen the 1939 version (which I have several times) you might have been a little critical. I wasn’t though. I loved that , like the original screenplay, men had no onscreen presence. I loved the camaraderie, the loyalty, and the drama of female bonding. And it was not lost on me that I was sitting there with my own girl posse.
Something that I learned long before my mid-life crisis is that you have got to have friends. And I am not talking about superficial friendships. I’m talking about friends who will cry for you when you can’t cry for yourself. Friends who will call you out on a dastardly deed one minute, and go upside someone else’s head the next for trying to call you out. Friends who will tell you that that dress, those shoes, that color does not look good on you, and stop tripping. Friends who will listen to your latest hair-brained scheme and see that it just might work (thanks Yas).
And just why are these friendships so important in mid life? Because women are wired to think in collective terms- you know, inclusive, not exclusive, we can do it if we all work together, etc, etc. Women have lived, laughed, and raised children together when their men were out hunting and gathering, going off to war, or just looking for materials to build a bigger, better hut. Some of my best friendships have developed during times of adversity. And some were just the result of instant connection and acknowledgement of kindred spirits.
I met Yasmin online in a book club that had much drama about ten years ago. We hit it off instantly. We both wanted to read and talk about books, and when Yas started APOOO, I was in, without hesitation. It’s been a few years since I have participated in book club activities, but my friendship with Yas has never been stronger. She has talked me off the parenting, professional, personal ledge on numerous occasions, and I have done the same for her. She helps me look at my life (mid-life crisis and all) from a rational, clear-minded perspective, something that I sometimes have trouble with.
When planning for your mid-life crisis, don’t forget your friends. Who else is going to tell you what you should do is head to Italy for a week instead of the yoga retreat, because really, after spending all that money on meditating, twisting, and turning, you are going to leave wanting some real food, real clothes, and a cute pair of heels to celebrate your success, so just skip right to the good part.
I was happy last Friday sitting with some of my closest friends laughing my ass off. I could relate to The Women on many levels, but walking out of the theater, I said a prayer of thanks that I had my own group of women to see me through.
So tell me APOOO readers, how have your friendships carried you through?
Related Posts
Djuanna Brockington is is a Southern Diva who knows about mid-life. Once she hit her 40s, life as she knew it no longer made sense. What she wanted and what she was experiencing, both personally and professionally, were not matching up, so she started seeking change. Be careful what you wish for. After 19 years of service, Djuanna left full-time employment in the public sector for life as a consultant and writer. When she is not chasing the dollars to pay the bills, she is enjoying her family and friends, reading whatever she can get her hands on, and working on that elusive novel. Visit Djuanna on the web at http://www.divafictionbytes.com
Email this author | All posts by Djuanna Brockington
Get New Posts via Email
I so love this! It’s as if you’re saying everything I’ve ever felt. I often joke that my closest friends were my enemies first, therefore making it impossible for us to be enemies again. People think that’s weird, but for us it fits perfectly.
I couldn’t imagine not having my girls support when my heart literally broke every single day for five straight years. Before you can ask for a Kleenex, their wiping your nose, and if you’re ready to go to war, they already got the Vaseline.
Have you ever picked up the phone and before you could speak the first word your girl was already telling you that things would be better?
My girlfriends are my ride or die chicks that keep it real, raw and gritty. Even if we’re feuding, (and a lot of times we are) the truth is, what we share is genuine and irreplaceable. I couldn’t imagine my life without them and I don’t want to ever have to do so!
Nardsbaby’s last blog post..Nardsbaby gave 5 stars to: Nan
I realize my on line friends are more supportive than the ones I have in my everyday life, so if that is included under my girl power THEY ROCK like POP ROCKS (for those who don’t know that is the fizz candy.)
They have helped me through the completion of a manuscript, and now they are my motivational support to do great (not good because goodness comes easy, greatness takes work) un school. I plan to graduate some kind of cum laude. I don’t have to purchase tickets to that occassion, so as many of my friends and family can attend. You all are cordially invited to see me smile big. But that is a long time from now.
I use them as sounding boards and we speak positivity into each other when life seems grim. I love them.
I read something about shoes…I wonder which one of them has a shoe fetish like me.
Jennifer C.’s last blog post..Jewelry Made By Me
Girl Power is ultimate…the women in my life shore me up…keep me straight and make me laugh….I love the women in my life…and I feel the love from them…
Angelia
I love my girlfriends and I agree with Jennifer (who happens to be my sistafriend) that the friends (true friends) I’ve met online have actually been more supportive of me than my offline friends. But I still love them all the same.
Darnetta’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen #5…what was that u said?
My girls are my girls and I love ‘em. We’ve supported each other through a little bit of everything from deaths to births, marriages to divorces, heartaches and joys, tragedies and triumphs. I am fortunate to have sisters by another mother and we’re down like four flat tires! Wouldn’t trade them in for nothing.
Ms. Toni’s last blog post..Ms Toni gave 5 stars to: The Sweetest Taboo
Being a member of this girl posse and knowing this southern diva inside and out…I smiled with pride reading this entry. She’s got Kahunas…and she inspires me daily.
Without my friends–true friends–I’d be lost. Lost in the woods without a compass crumpled in a pile of chigger infested moss crying my eyeballs out. (dramatic, much?)
Who would have thought this write bred, country girl would find such kindred spirits in this ecclectic group of women?
Thanks for all the comments! There is nothing like the power of true friendship.
And Lindsey, one of the best gifts I ever got was you as a friend. I love you girl, thru thick and thin. Thanks for stopping by.
It is amazing that my sister who is 2 years younger than me and my polar opposite has become one of my best friends. Now that we are both in our 30’s we appreciate the friendship that we can have on top of our sisterly bond. My very best friend in the whole world has been there for me no matter what and vise versa. We do not have to agree with each other and we do not force our opions down the others throat, which I find some of my new age friends tend to do and then get mad when I do not take their advise or handle a situation the way they feel I should. I miss NJ because that is where my best friend and sister are and I have to cry on their shoulder through the phone. My new age friends are here with me in Florida. I constantly find myself asking my best friend was I wrong when I fall out with my new age friends. She will always tell me,”girl you are being sensative” or “girl, you sure you have not hit her yet.” (she knows me, but I try to keep the Mike Tyson in me tame)
Ok, I guess I need to get back to work and answer these calls….wow I loved this post. Relax…Relate…Release
I wrote in the epigraph of Life Spices From Seasoned Sistahs: Women have always come together in the most trying of times, drawi8ng strength from one another and celebrating our times of triumps.
What would we do withouth the women in our lives?
Dera’s last blog post..I’ve Been Called Out