Hot Fun in the Summertime–Don’t Lay Hands on Me!
By APOOO • Aug 16th, 2008 • Category: APOOO Features, Hot Fun in the Summertime •
Email This Post
• 
Print This Post
Hands are often used as weapons of defense or as a gesture of love, concern to comfort someone. Recently, Victoria Olsteen quickly learned that ‘laying of hands’ does not always receive a favorable response. Most folks of color know that you don’t ‘lay your hands’ on a sistah in a confrontational manner if you don’t want a beatdown. Or in this sistah’s case (Olsteen altercation) to be sued for your action. Now, I wasn’t there so I’m not sure of what jumped-off but the sistah thought it was worth 10% of Victoria’s net worth and said sistah’s attorney asked for a judgment of $405K. Hmmm after deliberating for 2 hours the jury said NO…hail to the gnaw. Sistah is ish out of luck.
Growing up I spent many summers at camps or the neighborhood recreation center. The first few weeks were usually kumbaya moments where everyone was glad to be out of school and all got along well. But, somewhere around the middle of summer, or as the days got warmer and we entered what’s known as the ‘dog days of summer’…someone would get caught up and something would jump off. Yep we would have the annual summer fights. And I say fights because once one started others were sure to follow.
Fortunately, I rarely got into a fight. And, if I did it was always because of a sibling or cousin. The family rule was that if one of us got into a fight we all had to be on guard and ready to jump in, just in case the attcker decided to get back-up and double-team said family member. Although, I was Dorothy Jones’ daughter, and she never met a person she couldn’t beat, I was not a fighter. I had a sharp tongue and figured I could just as quickly beat you with words as I could with my fists. But, at the same time, don’t think you were going to run up on me and I not defend myself. But, I absolutely detested and hated when my siblings and cousins got into fights and tried not to be around when I saw one coming on. I don’t know why my brothers and cousins thought that just because they saw David Caine on television that they were Kung Fu fighters and could imitate him on the streets of Florida. Hmmm…NO. The only thing that Kung Fu fighting got them was a butt whipping. LOL.
When I got to high school, some folks social/people skills still had not developed and they still did not know how to resolve conflict without using their hands. But the stakes had changed. Now, folks would schedule fights. LOL. Yep and I know some of ya’ll know what I’m talking about…hehe. Every now and then there would be a fight after school. But first sistahs had to go home, braid their hair, take off the hoop earrings and apply vaseline to the face. Hmmm…couldn’t get the face scratched up. LOL.
After elementary school, I didn’t get into any fights. Remember I was good with using my words and some folks didn’t know if I was cussing them out or complementing them. That and the fact that an older boy thought he was going to kick my butt in the 5th grade (I went to private school and we had grades K-8; he was a 7th grader) and he ended up in the hospital and I ended up in the principal’s office with my mom asking…’WHY.’ Mom believed if someone said ‘I’m going to whip your butt’…you didn’t wait for them to do it…you didn’t even allow them to pass the first lick…you just proceeded to kick their arze to show them who was in charge. LOL. Anyway, after that incident my reputation proceeded me and I never had another fight.
But…that didn’t stop me and one of my half-sisters from watching fights. Just as some folks are ambulance chasers, my sister was a fight chaser. No matter what she always got word when a fight was going on and off we would go…yea I lived vicariously via her…to get a good seat for the latest fight. For my sister, it was a sport. LOL. Rain, nor sleet, nor hail…not even snow (I know it doesn’t snow in FL…lol) could stop us from showing up for a good fight. But a thorn in our side–or should I say my sister’s side–did.
It was the fight of all fights. My sister and I arrived early and hung out with the other early onlookers. Once the fight got underway, it was explosive and more and more folks showed up. As the crowd expanded, my sister and I, as well as everyone else on our side, kept getting pushed back into the woods. I don’t know what happened next; everything happened so fast but my sister was injured. Seems that she had been shoved into some bushes, including a couple of rose bush, and she ended up with what seemed like thousands of thorns all over her body as well as a 12 inch cut on her thigh. To say that my parents were upset that they had to take her to the hospital to get 50/11 stitches is an understatement. After they realized that it wasn’t as bad as initially thought, they grounded both of us for a month, but we only served time for about a week. Hmmm my sister was good at talking her way out of anything. After the cut healed, my sister had a scar that stayed with her until the day she died. But that scar was a rude reminder of what happens when you chase fights and we never chased a fight after that…nor did we ever stick around to see one. Although my sister always had that chase spirit; she went on to become an attorney. LOL. No, in all seriousness, she didn’t chase ambulances, she was a corporate attorney/litigator. Yep, she was truly the one with the golden tongue so she NEVER had a physical fight in her entire life.
Fast forward 30 years later, folks don’t seem to fight fair today. While I don’t condone violence of any kind, sometimes you can’t get rid of bullies without getting physical. Although, I’m so happy that neither of my kids have been in fights and that we live in a somewhat violent-free zone. I can’t imagine either of them getting into a fight because folks no longer use their hands to resolve their issues. Today, everyone is quick to resort to any weapon other than their hands. Today’s weapons aren’t even knives…it’s guns…automatic weapons…and sometime result in drive bye shootings which often claim innocent lives…young kids whose lives have just barely begun. It’s a sad situation and an environment that no one should have to call home.
Recently, I was talking to a girlfriend who mentioned that she bought a street fiction book for her son because he was stressing so hard with school work and being away from home that she thought a book from this genre would be a good diversion…distraction. Her son not only read that book but he purchased a few others for his reading pleasures. He vicariously experiences life on the streets by reading street/urban fiction novels. Since street/urban fiction continues to grow in popularity, I wonder how many of us live vicariously via these books. I also wonder if any of those books have any good fight scenes for me to live vicariously…lol.
APOOO Books
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
- Have you ever been in a fight?
- If so, why and who started the fight?
- If not, did you ever have to avoid a fight? What did you do?
- What rules did your parents have when it came to fighting?
- Do you think fights between youth are worse today than during your youth? Why?
- What street/urban fiction titles can you think of which included memorable fight scenes?
Related Posts
APOOO is an online author and reader community dedicated to advancing African American literature. Our mission is to expose readers of all ages to a good book in any genre; to support African American authors, books, literary events and bookclubs; to provide marketing resources, tools and tips to authors; and, to promote literacy within the African American community.
Email this author | All posts by APOOO
1. Have you ever been in a fight? Heck yeah
2. If so, why and who started the fight? The girl started it by calling my mommy a bitch and I ended it by kicking her butt.
3. If not, did you ever have to avoid a fight? What did you do? N/A
4. What rules did your parents have when it came to fighting? You better win was the only rule.
5. Do you think fights between youth are worse today than during your youth? Why? Yes because there are no real fights with fists nowadays. There are weapons and little value placed on life.
6. What street/urban fiction titles can you think of which included memorable fight scenes?
I don’t remember a book with a fight that didn’t turn deadly.
Darnetta’s last blog post..I’ve been TAGGED!!!
Hey Darnetta and thanks for chiming in…and gurl fights today too often are deadly…I hear you about you better win…cause if you don’t when you get home I’m going to tap that behind…hmmm now how many parents told their kids that…and how many kids still lost…because all of us couldn’t be winners…lol.
xoxo
PS that gurl who called your mom a name deserved a beatdown…she knew better than to call mom a name!
Have you ever been in a fight? Every year of school… I have a smart mouth…sigh
If so, why and who started the fight? Usually I did by saying something out of pocket. I didn’t have nice clothes, or school age siblings, so my mouth was my first line of defense.
If not, did you ever have to avoid a fight? What did you do? Ran
What rules did your parents have when it came to fighting? My mother was against it.
Do you think fights between youth are worse today than during your youth? Yes Why? Darnetta hit the nail on the head.
Have you ever been in a fight? Yep
If so, why and who started the fight?
Several, mostly with my male cousins. Fighting them taught me how to fight so I didn’t have too many problems with girls, they were easy to put down. Until one year this girl moved in the neighborhood, and I swear she must have been bred for fighting. She had old scars and scratches in her face and she would go around beating boys and girls. I was terrified of her. She terrorized everyone and her mother was too busy with a house full of kids to care about the trouble her daughter was getting into. So parents complaints were falling on deaf ears. My mother told me that if she ever ran up on me, fight her like my life depended on it, because if she beat me she will keep picking. Sure enough the day came when she targeted me. I don’t know what came over me because I was TERRIFIED but I stood there with my fists clinched and the look of death on my face. I used every bad word I had ever heard in my life and cursed her like a mad man. Kids that gathered around were shocked by the words, there were so many gasps. And I was screaming from the top of my voice that if she wanted a piece of me she was going to have to come and get it. I think I went insane for a moment. She was so shocked she bagged down, and walked away. I think I scared her. That moment on she never challenged me and always would say hi when we passed one another. That was the last time I ever had a “fight”. I was about 10.
What rules did your parents have when it came to fighting? Hold your ground and never back down. Although we were taught to never start anything.
Do you think fights between youth are worse today than during your youth? Why?
Today its all about street credit and some sense of “respect”. Mostly children today don’t understand that just because you get licked in a fight doesn’t mean that your manhood/womanhood is somehow taken. And I dare say that today most of them don’t know how to fight so to save face they will grab a weapon. I guess its more important to show people that you are willing to kill for your “respect” and sit in jail for the rest of your life than it is to get a beat down.
What street/urban fiction titles can you think of which included memorable fight scenes? Don’t read it.