Metamorphosis by Rambling Raven

Finally!!! I joined the rest of the world and opened a Facebook account. It has been both fun and bittersweet getting reacquainted with former friends and classmates. I have located former friends and classmates who are now parents and professionals. I have reveled in the joys they have been blessed with and my heart has broken in learning of tragedies that have endured.  One of the more amusing things that I recently discovered upon joining Facebook, is that a former classmate who wanted to date me back in high school is now a bodybuilder. I just may have to revisit that friendship sometime in the near future. You know, just to say hello, of course. LOL.

The most poignant story to emerge from Facebook is that I recently found my best friend, Kerri from elementary school. For years we were inseparable. Yet, we stopped communicating in our teens. The first blow to our friendship came when we attended different high schools. We started to befriend and socialize with other people. Our interests changed due to the fact that we were in different environments. My family sent me to a private school while Kerri went to a public high school. I found myself surrounded by kids whose families were part of Chicago’s Black middle and upper class, while Kerri’s classmates were a hodge-podge of different races from different economic backgrounds. While she was busy having fun dating guys from different ethnic and social groups, I was busy visiting historical Black colleges, going to pool parties and hanging out with kids who drove their parents’ Mercedes to school. Then suddenly, Kerri’s father made a career change and her parents had to relocate to another state. We vowed to stay in touch but due to distance and changing interests, our friendship just sort of faded away. We forgot to write those weekly letters we promised to write and the phone calls became more and more infrequent, until one day they just stopped.

Getting reacquainted with my friend has put so many things into prospective for me. It is amazing that in spite of everything, I still see the spirit of the girl I knew alive and well within the adult Kerri. She still has the same smile, quirky sense of humor and contagious laugh. However, there is a totally different woman there too. A woman I am only now getting to know. Kerri is certainly more confident and in control then the adolescent I knew. The girl, who once cried because she thought she looked hideous in her class pictures, has grown into an attractive, pleasant woman. And although I am please to be back in touch with my friend, I can’t help but see how much I have and have not changed in her eyes as well.

Keri says she still sees the sensible, intelligent, witty kid she knew still within me. She said that she is not surprised at all that I am still single because I was always picky when it came to guys. And she knew I wouldn’t settle just for anyone. To my surprise she reminded me how I was such a romantic. I laughed because she was right, even after all this time, Kerri still remembered my dreams of raising a family in a house near the ocean. She told me that I was always a dreamy kid and I still have that desire to explore exotic places and the world around me. But what surprised me the most was when she said that through the years, whenever she browsed a bookstore she just knew she was going to come across my name because being a writer was my absolute desire. Wow, talking about a dream deferred.

Reconnecting with Kerri has been interesting in the sense that I can see the metamorphosis we have both undergone. It makes me a little sad as well because when talking to Kerri, I see the person I once was, the person I became, and the person I wanted to be. She makes me recall dreams that have now gone unfulfilled and aspects of myself that I lost. Through our conversations I am forced to relive all the pains and joys of childhood. And I am often left in awe of how we let “life” transform us from starry-eyed, hopeful children we once were to the complicated adults we are now.

It has been a lifetime since Kerri and I shared all our hopes and dreams. And we both know that realistically we may never regain the friendship we once had. But for now we are content with letting the little girls we once were reacquaint themselves with one another. As an adult I am thankful for the chance to reconnect with an old friend because reminiscing keeps me in awe of the metamorphosis that took me from that young girl to the woman I am now.

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